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Before getting Angry and Impatient Think

Society today is very rush rush. We are always in a hurry racing from one place to the next. Sometimes  people slow us down and we get angry and frustrated. The next time someone is serving you and they are slow ,before getting angry and reproaching them, stop and think. Not everyone who is slow is being lazy. You may be about to get angry at someone who is genuinely trying their hardest.
I think we have all been guilty of this at sometime but I really should know better.

Their is a teenage boy in one of my local fast food restaurants who is very slow. He takes much longer then everyone else to serve . I was in a hurry one day and I began to feel a bit grumpy because he was taking so long but then I stopped myself. I remembered that I know what it is like to be trying your hardest and have people get angry and tell you that your lazy. The problem is if you have dyspraxia or one of several other special needs that have the same difficulties, being reproached will actually be counter productive. When I am trying to do something and I am told to hurry up , I start to drop or spill things. We have to think about what we are doing and complaining distracts us.

Instead of complaining about this young boy I stood back and observed. I noticed that when he was serving the fries he stopped to pick up each packet. It is hard to explain but I could see his awkwardness and I recognised myself.I have been in a similar situation myself many times. People think you are being lazy because your slow or that your stupid because everyone else can do it a certain way so why can’t you. Nobody else can see how hard you are concentrating to try to do that one thing. Sometimes so much that your head begins to hurt.

. One problem that many  people with dyspraxia have is that we cant judge the speed and distance of a moving object.Why is that a problem? Well think about it for a minute. When you cross the road the cars are moving, when someone throws a ball ( or any object) to you it is moving and the stairs on an escalator are moving. This makes you over cautious. I can’t tell you how many times we will be waiting to cross a road with a lot of traffic and my children will cross the road. They will turn around and I will still be standing on the other side of the road. ” Mum you could have crossed then” they will say rolling their eyes. But my brain can’t estimate how fast the cars are moving so self preservation makes me over cautious.They didn’t complain after I explained it to them. I know that they get frustrated but it is not easy to blindly follow someone else.

A situation I always find difficult is getting on and off of escalators. Stepping onto a moving object when you can’t tell how fast it is moving can be quite stressful. I just have to guess when to step on and hope I don’t fall. I also must hold onto the side especially getting on and off. I don’t like when the escalators are busy because people just push behind you because they are in a hurry. If I am able to, I let everybody get on first. But sometimes there are just too many people. If my daughter is with me she stands behind me to slow people down. I also cant get onto an escalator holding on to my son. He is nervous of escalators and his hesitation will make me lose my balance. My daughter will often pick my son up and carry him onto the escalator. When she was younger I would often see people looking as if to say why don’t you carry your child instead of the young girl doing it. This is why you shouldn’t judge situations when you are not aware of all he facts. When I explained my situation with escalators to a friend last year. He said that in future he will think before he goes rushing past people on escalators.

I really hate crowded trains. We are always asked to move down the train but because my balance is not as good as everyone else I have to hold on or I will fall over when the train stops.
People are very understanding if they can see that there is a problem but when you look just like everyone else they get grumpy when you won’t move.
What we all need to do is to not judge people and situations because often there are reasons for peoples actions that you are not aware of. It doesn’t cost anything to have an open mind and show some tolerance of other people.

Sharon Beaumont

I am a single mother of 4 who has lived with dyspraxia for several decades. My hope is that by sharing my experiences I can help to raise awareness of dyspraxia. I trained as an Education Assistant but found some areas of this to be a difficult career if you have dyspraxia. Currently I am an Information Technology Student and am trying to teach my self to speak French. I love travel, writing and anything French.

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